24 August 2023

Cai is in his customary position . . .

Cai is sitting on his hotel bed, which is now even more untidy, and ignores his phone, which is ringing.   Then there is a knocking at the door and Siôn’s voice can be heard;  

. . . and once again Siôn is outside the door

“I know you’re in there – I can hear the phone!” he shouts, “Come on, I’ve got you a little treat.”

Cai knows that he will not stop knocking, so goes to open the door;  

"Room service, sir?"

“Room service, sir?” Siôn asks, but he says he has already had breakfast.    

"Brown sauce or ketchup?"

Siôn is not deterred;  he continues, “Right, one of life’s big questions – brown sauce or ketchup?”

"I'll have it later"

He is told to put it down and Cai will have it later;  he maintains that he is watching something on television.   

Siôn blocks his view of the television

Siôn sits on the bed and suggests, “You must have something better to do that, surely?   Come on – breakfast, shower and we’ll go for a walk.”   

Cai responds that he is on holiday, so he can do what he wants;  

"I'm not moving from here . . ."

in turn, Siôn declares, “I’m not moving from here until you listen to me – and I’ve got all day.”

Ffion prepares for her appointment

At Cysgod y Glyn, Ffion is eating her breakfast when her mobile phone rings;  it is Arwen.   

"Yes, Arwen, I remember"

Yes, I remember – 

"I'll be fine on my own"

“I’ll be fine on my own – I’m a big girl now.   I won’t be there long.”   

She wonders what the results will be

She sits and wonders what will be the results of her tests.

Cai has been persuaded

Siôn’s persistence has paid off, as he and Cai are now walking through a field.   “I’ve been looking at flats for you, but there is nothing suitable, unfortunately,” says Siôn.   However, Cai maintains that he is happy where he is.

"That hotel is not up to scratch"

“That hotel is not up to scratch – don’t you fancy going away for a few nights before the end of the holidays?” Siôn suggests, and is told that he does not have anyone to go with.   

"I'd come with you"

“I wouldn’t expect you to go on your own – I’d come with you.”

“You?” sneers Cai, “You don’t want me anywhere near Y Felin!”   

"You can come back any time you want"

Siôn insists that is not true and stresses that he can come back any time he wants.

“If I didn’t worry about you, I wouldn’t be here now,” says Siôn, 

"I just want to be on my own, Siôn"

but Cai makes it quite clear that he does not need Siôn – he simply wants to be on his own and he walks away, with Siôn following him.

"Why don't you answer your phone?"

Iolo opens the door of Y Felin to Mathew, who demands, “Why don’t you answer your phone?”   Iolo replies that he is having a quiet morning, wondering if Mathew has ever heard of mindfulness.

Mathew describes the job to be done

“How do you fancy some work today for APD?   We need to replumb a toilet and the copper pipe is split into the wall.”   Iolo protests that does not sound like a small job, but Mathew will write down the address for him.   

"You've taken the morning off to play?

Then he notices what Iolo is doing;  “Oh yeah – you’ve taken the morning off so you can play – not to do mindfulness.”

Iolo insists that it is beneficial to the mind;  “Concentrating on one thing that doesn’t get you stressed – 

"It's a place in Singapore"

“it’s Marina Bay Sands – a place in Singapore.”

Mathew attempts to help

Mathew picks up a piece and attempts to put it in place, 

"That should be a blue one!"

but is reprimanded that a blue one should go there.   “Don’t you have work to do?” asks Iolo, 

"Work can wait for a while"

and Mathew thinks that work can wait for a while, but does not want Jason to know.

"Doing anything nice today?"

In the Deri, Cheryl serves Dani with her coffee and asks if she is doing anything nice today;  the replies is that she is not.   

"Strange that we're both starting afresh"

Gaynor is also there and regards it as strange that they have both moved out of their homes and are starting afresh.

"Have you been to see Gwern?"

Cheryl asks after Gwern, wondering if Dani has been to see him;  “He doesn’t want to see me,” is her reply.   Gaynor interrupts to say that the authorities will give him plenty of attention and support, but it is easy to worry unnecessarily.

"The care and well being has improved significantly"

She goes on, “The care and well-being of children in detention has improved significantly.”   

Dani does not want to hear this

Dani simply takes her coffee and moves away.   

"If the boy had received attention at home . . ."

Then Gaynor tells Cheryl, “If the boy had received attention at home, he wouldn’t be where he is now.”

"That's the last thing she wants to hear"

Cheryl urges her to keep her voice down;  “That’s the last thing she wants to hear!”

"Call yourself a builder, Mathew?"

Mathew is continuing with this construction project, but is informed by Iolo, “That shouldn’t go there – you have no idea!   Call yourself a builder?   I wouldn’t let you build a Jenga tower.”

"This is quite therapeutic"

Mathew is indeed finding this quite therapeutic;  Iolo comments that hours fly by without him noticing sometimes.   

"It took me a long time after Izzy"

“You’re doing remarkably well, considering you’ve lost Tyler,” says Mathew, “It took me a long time to be able to leave the flat after Izzy.”

"What helped you, then?"

Iolo is becoming flustered and asks what helped him.   “Routine – friends – and knowing I had to carry on.   Not carrying on would be insulting to Izzy.”   

Iolo takes one of his tablets

Iolo takes another of his anti-anxiety tablets, and Mathew continues that there is not a right or wrong way;  Iolo must do whatever he has to do to get him through this.   

"Look what I've done!"

Mathew has actually joined together several parts and Iolo congratulates him.

They sit on a bench in the fresh air

Two children are playing football as Siôn and Cai sit on a bench;  

"This won't last for ever, Cai"

“This won’t last for ever,” says Siôn, “The children will want their father as they grow older.”   

"They've got a better father now!"

Cai answers that they have got a better father now, but Siôn regards this as just a phase and he will be there to help Cai through it.

"You need professional help"

“But you need to find someone who can give you professional help.”   

"Right, I'm going"

At this, Cai decides that he is going, but is encouraged to consider it.

"I don't want to talk to some shrink!"

“No – I don’t want to talk about my feelings with some shrink!” Cai exclaims, 

"Get in touch if you are tempted"

so Siôn pleads with him to get in touch if he gets the urge to self-harm.   

"You're the shrink now, are you?"

“What?   You’re the shrink now, are you?”   As Siôn invites him to come back to Y Felin, Cai walks away.

"Well, how did it go, Mam?"

Ffion is back from her appointment and Arwen comes in, demanding to know what happened;  

"It was the cirrhosis tablets"

“It was the cirrhosis tablets – I’m going to be fine.   They caused low blood pressure, which led to the blackouts.   All that worry and I only have to change my tablets.”

"When do you get the new ones?"

Arwen immediately wants to know when she will get the new tablets;  

"We can go on another London trip"

“I’ll go to the chemist later – and we can go on another London trip before school starts, OK?”   

"I'm so glad, Mam!"

Arwen is overjoyed that her mother is all right 

Ffion hugs her

and they hug.

Dani is offered a refill

Cheryl comes over to Dani, asking if she wants a refill of her coffee and then sits down beside her;  

"It's sometimes easier to talk to a stranger"

“I know you don’t know me very well, but if you want to talk, I’m here.   It’s sometimes easier to talk to a stranger.”

"Do you know a good solicitor?"

“Actually – do you know a good solicitor?” says Dani, “I don’t think Gwern’s is great.”   

"I can bring you a nice lunch while you're looking . . ."

Cheryl cannot help her there, but can bring her a nice lunch while she is looking on her phone.

". . . the quiche looks lovely today"

“The quiche looks lovely today,” she adds, and Dani agrees, as reading all the details is going to take some time.

Siôn is told the good news 

Siôn is at Cysgod y Glyn, where he learns about Ffion’s news, which he regards as great.   

"They're going to monitor me"

“They’re going to monitor me, but hopefully the new medication will sort out the blackouts,” Ffion tells him.

"Cai needs help straightaway"

Then he gets to the point of his visit;  “Look, Cai’s had an emergency come up and he needs help straightaway.”   

"He's not my responsibility"

Ffion replies that he is not her responsibility.   

"You're a colleague and ex-partner"

“But you are a colleague and an ex-partner,” Siôn continues, “And you know what it’s like to be in a dark place and to need help.”

"Why have you turned your back on him?"

“If you’re that worried, why have you turned your back on him?” she enquires;  Siôn denies that he has done that and has been trying to persuade him to come back to Y Felin – but he is still angry.

Ffion asks what Siôn wants her to do.   

"Dom you think he can stay here for a while?"

“He needs a friend – and you know him better than anyone.   Do you think he can stay here for a while?”

“And it doesn’t matter if he upsets me and Arwen?” protests Ffion.   

"Can you give us a moment, please?"

Siôn asks Arwen if she will give them a moment, 

Arwen does so

so she leaves the room.   

"He's been self-harming"

“Someone needs to be with Cai at all times – he’s been self-harming,” Siôn goes on, 

"He needs professional help, then"

and Ffion responds that he needs professional help.   Siôn says that he is refusing that;  “Perhaps we can persuade him if he leaves that hotel.”

"I'm sorry, but he can't come here"

“I’m really sorry, Siôn, but he can’t come here,” is Ffion’s answer, 

"I'll have to find something else"

so Siôn concludes he will have to find another solution.   

Now she feels guilty

He leaves her feeling very guilty, as he intended.

"I'd rather do these than go out clubbing"

Mathew is getting interested in this kit building business, and asks if Iolo has any more of them, as he would not mind borrowing them.   “I know I sound old, but I’d rather do these than go out clubbing.”   

"I've always preferred this sort of thing"

Iolo has always preferred doing things like this.

"Rhys always wants to go out"

“It’s a pity Rhys doesn’t feel the same – he always wants to go out,” Mathew complains and is reminded that he does not have to go out with Rhys every time.

“Come on, Math – life’s too short to be doing things you don’t want to do,” Iolo advises.   Mathew wonders if that applies to him, refusing to come to work with APD this afternoon 

"Right, I'd better go"

and is about to leave when Iolo suggests that they should finish their model first.

Ffion ponders the matter

Ffion is giving serious thought to Siôn’s proposal when Arwen comes in;  

Arwen has found a hotel in London

“Do you want to see this hotel I’ve found for us in London?”   

She can see her mother is not happy

She sees her mother’s doleful expression 

"We should help Cai . . ."

and adds, “If Cai’s in such a mess, you should help him – Jinx will move out soon – and I like Cai.   We should help him – 

". . . I missed my chance with Gwern"

“I missed my chance to help Gwern – perhaps I can help someone else.”

"You did help Gwern"

Ffion protests that she did help Gwern;  he might not realise that now, but he will one day.   Arwen will go out and see if she can find her friends.

"Why am I bothering?"

After some more research, Dani sighs, “Why am I bothering?   I can’t afford them.”   

"Only the people who can afford it . . ."

Cheryl agrees that the people who can afford the best barristers get off the hook.   Dani just wanted to find out what Gwern’s rights are – whether he can get legal aid.

Cheryl asks if he has been in trouble before;  

"I think I've made a huge mistake"

“Not with the police,” Dani replies, “I think I’ve made a huge mistake – I told them not to give him bail – so it’s my fault he’s in jail.”

"You did what you thought was best for him"

Cheryl imagines that she did what she thought was best for him and Dani confesses, “Don’t tell anyone this – but I’m scared of him.   He used to be so sweet, but he’s not the same person any more – he’s angry with everyone, 

"I'm scared he'll turn on Gabriel and Seren"

“and what I’m most scared of is that he would turn on Gabriel and Seren.”

"You're an amazing mother!"

Cheryl confirms that she has definitely done the right thing and that she is an amazing mother;  “You’re still supporting him and trying to find him a top of the range solicitor.”   Dani appreciates the encouragement.

"Sorry about earlier, Siôn"

Ffion arrives at Y Felin, apologising for her attitude earlier;  

"I shouldn't have put pressure on you"

Siôn is sorry that he put pressure on her, but does not know how to deal with Cai – doing nothing is not an option.

"We're happy for him to stay . . ."

“We don’t want to regret it if he harms himself,” Ffion adds, “I’ve talked it over with Arwen and we’re happy for him to stay – but only temporarily, 

". . . if he gets help"

on the basis that he finds somewhere to live and gets help.”

Siôn reassures her that he has already started to look for help and is sure that they will find somewhere suitable for him to stay before long.   

"Shall we go and fetch him now?"

He is very grateful to Ffion and suggests that they go to fetch him now, as the sooner he leaves that hotel, the better.

"As quickly as that?"

 She was not expecting things to move so quickly, but Siôn does not like the thought of him spending another night there.

"Thanks for the chat, Cheryl"

Dani brings her empty plate back to the bar, where Gaynor is still sitting;  “Thanks for the lunch and the chat,” she says, 

"It's just nice to know someone doesn't blame me"

“It’s just nice to know that someone doesn’t blame me for this mess.”   Cheryl invites her to call in again if she needs a chat.

"You and Dani are getting along well"

Gaynor remarks that she and Dani appear to be getting along well, 

"She's going through a hard time"

and is told that she is going through a hard time;  “I know how that feels,” says Cheryl.

"There's no point trying to be popular"

Gaynor maintains that there is no point trying to be popular with everyone, which is just not possible.   Cheryl asks what good it would do to point the finger at Dani;  

"It's important to see the best in people"

she thinks that it is important to see the best in people, 

Gaynor does not share this view

but Gaynor does not share this feeling.

He is back on the bed again

Cai is once again lying on his bed, watching the television, when Siôn returns;  “I’ve got some good news – I’ve found you somewhere to stay!” he shouts, through the door.

"Stop fussing, Siôn!"

Cai responds that he is happy where he is and tells Siôn to stop fussing;  “I’m not fussing – you need help!”

He maintains that he is dealing with it in his own way, 

Ffion wants to have a try

and then Ffion takes over;  “Siôn’s explained the situation to me and I want to help you – 

"There's room for you to stay with me and Arwen"

“there is room for you to stay with me and Arwen.” 

He opens the door . . .

By this time he has opened the door

. . . and they look at each other

and they look each other in the eye.

Gaynor looks around Maes-y-Deri . . .

Back at Maes-y-Deri, Gaynor looks disparagingly around the place, 

. . . and takes out her iPad

takes out her iPad 

She wants to be more popular . . .

and enters ‘how to be more popular’ in GoSearch.   

. . . and studies the search results

Then she follows some of the links.

"People will wonder why I'm back here"

Arriving at Cysgod y Glyn, Cai says, “Many will be scratching their heads, wondering why I’m back here.”   Siôn says that he will explain why Y Felin is not convenient.

"I'll make it clear there's nothing going on"

Ffion adds that she will make it clear that there is nothing going on between them.   Cai is assured that he is not alone and will get through this.   

"Arwen remembered these are your favourites"

Then Ffion notices the packet of Jammie Dodgers which have been conspicuously placed;  “Arwen has remembered that they are your favourites,” she says, and Cai is quite touched by this.

"Don't expect miracles"

“I appreciate the fact that you want to help, but don’t expect miracles,” Cai warns;  

"Don't you expect too much fuss"

Ffion tells him not to expect too much fuss.   He already knows where everything is and he cannot believe that he is in such a state.

"It's a good sign that you realise"

Siôn regards it as a good sign that he realises, and Ffion agrees, “You’re more likely to do something about it then.”

He looks at Arwen's message . . .

Cai walks across to the packet of biscuits and looks at the accompanying message;  ‘Welcome to the flat.   Excited to see you later.  Arwen  x’.   

. . . and is moved to tears

This makes him very emotional.